New me ;)

OCT

Hey guys!!!!

hhihihih, hola a todos?!?

he sido un gran!!!
Its a saturday night and tomorrow is going to be a fantastic sunday because...........


we are going out of town, wwwoottt wwoot! road trip :D

well anywho, I just made a tumblr, hihihihi... please do visit and follow ;)
http://fragilerfection.tumblr.com/

do follow ;)
And I was really iseng with my day today soo..... here's a photo..





see you guys monday and have a great weekend! :)

Things to complete!

MUST DO!!!!

1. make a tumblr
2. know how to put DAILY MAKE UP
3. find me within in NY

:)

In 2 days 3 weeks! :D

Hola a todos! :)

OMG it's been a while since I have been writing here and I am oh so very sorry!!!! So I was told that we were moving on the 27th and all of a sudden ON THE 21ST AFTER MY DATE, my LAST date with Ardan on THE NIGHT as I GOT HOME I was told were moving the next day and were to start packing IMMEDIATELY as we got home. I think it was the worst yet the best night because I can finally just let things go without me having to pull it back. When will I ever start to branch and let go of Indo if it didn't go that way? So many things that haven't been said and so many are still kept inside everyone, but I am glad it didn't come out. At least it makes it feel real and mysterious. I have a reason to now go home with all that I have left.

It is a 23 hour plane ride to Mexico city and we transit at Paris, France. Here is the family and me at Paris;)


Aren't we just a happy family? hihihii ;) We were tourist for like 2 days and a night and we stayed at the Wisma in Paris, SORRY TANTE SULLY AK DULUAN YANG TIDUR DISITU ;p And we went straight to mexico!! AND BOOYYY!!! this house is B-E-Y-O-N-D huge.

Here is me in the side yard

In the back of me is the gym OUTSIDE.. We all have private gym's inside our bathroom and especially my dads. So yes, WE BALLIN'!!!

I have been traveling around mexico city and of course dinning at SAKS which is beyond fine dinning. It was just a perfect lunch, hihihih. Hope to take you guys there soon :)


I am currently staying here until My classes in NY begin, and my pengumuman for CUNY is next month, SO INSYALLAH BISMILLAH!!! AAAMIINNN I will get accepted. Its been a great vacation But.... I gotta step up my game and start studying.. Hopefully I will transfer my grades after the first year to......




or...


Place pray for me :D hihihihi
Right now I am currently at home and I am starting my classes for Spanish tomorrow and I am UBBEEERR EXCITED!!! hihihihih

untitled

Know whats the real weird part of always being the player? In the end you realize your the one getting played from all the false pretences you made

come, come, come..... come back to my reality. wake, wake, wake me up from this anxiety

Just a dream

I was thinkin about her, thinkin about me
Thinkin about us, what we gonna be?
Open my eyes, yeah; it was only just a dream

wow, just a dream
If everything I have put on and eventually lost it all
Have I really had it all along or was it all just a dream?
All the tears, love, pain and struggle........

all GONE?!

The thing about this is the man you wish swept you off your feet, REALLY TRULY AND UTTERLY swept me off mines

His an addictive drug
Once is a ride, second is longing the third is pure addiction

Perfection; oddly the easiest way we make mistakes once we've tasted it
EGO taking over to gain MORE and MORE

so, after all of this is over...

Are you real or just a dream?

IED MUBARAK!

HAPPY MUBARAK IED EVERYONE! :D

May god bless us this month full of berkah! Semoga amal ibadah kita diterima disisinya dunia dan akherat, aaamiinnn

This is my first batch of food:

And this is my second batch :p


I was about to sign up for TUMBLR when I found this post that just made me cry a bit inside:

I’m a gay, teenage boy. And I wish I was attracted to women. I want a family when I’m older, I want kids and a wife. And it kills me knowing I’m not attracted to women. So instead, I sleep with a load of men to take my mind off it. Sometimes I just wish the ground would hurry up and swallow me.

NEW LAYOOUUUTT!

I need something new!

and yessshhh I am back to updating my blog!

How you guys liking it?

So again I have been sick for 3rd time since last month and I think i'm getting skinner by the day, I don't fit an S in Zara anymore!

I AM LOSING ALL MY LADY LUMPS :'(

Round and round and round

Hey guys, I've been so busy lately that I haven't been able to have time to blog

How is everyone going right now? I hope everyone has had an amazing summer as I had and is ready to go back to work ;)
I'm going to change the color a bit, cause this is kinda good news :p
So on exactly the 9th of august my dad had his inauguration on becoming DUTA BESAR MEXICO!!!Iam of course extremely proud and happy to be his daughter
This is a pic of me and gina getting ready for the party :)

Of course the whole thing went smooth and really memorable, we met with the president which I was really shocked to find that he was very nice and a really charismatic human being. We all know by this, this mean i'm all set to go to MEEEXIICCOOOO!!!! :D
yes, this means VACAAAA!!! Because a couple of months ago I wasn't able to go bali, hihihiihi. This is a picture of us as the happy family right after the ceremony


Well as you all know, I am now continuing my studies abroad, in the COUNTRY OF UNCLE SAM :D
I am currently applying to THE CITY UNIVERSITY OF NEW YORK AKA. CUNY
and hoping to try out some other places. I am thinking of trying for BURKELEY AND UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LOS ANGELES AKA UCLA. I am enrolling for the spring term but unfortunately for burkeley and UCLA I think I will be enrolling for the fall term. Do hope your prayers are always with me ;)

I have finally graduated from high school! lol, kinda a long while ago but oh well thought you guys autto know :p

OMG IM A TRENDSETTER

this is paris on the 29th of june 2010, this is me in october 28th 2009

Braces are off!!!!!!!!! :D

long gone from the face of the earth

Seriously Its been a while since Ive been on the blog, and its scary. Its all like, ghetto and like being shity on me -.-

But all is good, im playing Wifi at my room so I just thought of updating my blog. How is everyone doing? my tofels are coming up this saturday, and I'm more exhausted then nervous. Wish me the best of luck guys! :D

As you all know, I did not take both UI and UGM. And decided to just go and take SNMPTN again just for the hell of it. Im so nervous of the pengumuman padahal Im not really depending on it, hihihihihi. adrenaline rush is running through my vains :D

skiiinnyyy

didn't know I would get this skinny

daddy's little princess

daddy I love you :)
That's the only thing I know best saying. I've been saying it all my life now. I can say I'm also the most spoiled and loved kid in the family. And I thank him for everything I have received. but with the age thats rapidly increasing, I've come to ask myself.. When will I be able to pay him back for everything he has done?
So I want to tell you dad, your everything I think of when I study and work hard to achieve my dreams. Someday I hope you get to taste the victory I worked so hard on. And someday for once, I can be asking you how much money you need or when you want o get picked up from your golf games. I love you dad, I'm sorry my achievement is yet to come, but don't worry big man. It'll come very veeerry soon :)



P.s. I love you dad. And will never get bored saying it <3

midnight thoughts

I'm laying here in bed

Not sleepy, and my boyfriend just leavt me to go catch his flight to la la land
But then again, I do this to him.... LIKE ALL THE TIME! lol ;p
I'm just looking at my white boarded room and listening to "the power of love"
btw, A MUST DOWNLOAD!
soothing song
But as im listening to it, I've stumbled on thinking to myself about what the power of love has done to me
I think love was everything and the only thing I can say I remember when I grew up. I didn't grow up on a rich family, but grew on to be a rich.
Nothing but classic persistent hard work.
I grew up having strict old school parents with tight up-bringing.
I guess maybe that's why I never really actually fitted with the crowd.
I just always made the crowd fit me
The hardest part about being different is not being understood
And I have been blessed to have my eyes open to the oh-so great people and the oh-so not great people
Being with my boyfriend now is the only thing, I think, is a blessing in disguise
His not just a soul mate but also a best friend
Not to forget, a keen advisor, brother and anything I need him to be
He's that buy 1 get 100 type's of packages
I didn't want to miss out on this opportunity and oh boy I didn't :)
His charming, quite, loving, charismatic, intelligent, patient, humorist, trustworthy and loyal.
Everything you want in 1 seeeeeeeeeee :)
I can't stop smiling to myself on how far we've driven each other to insanity and roads of endless possibility
I'm walking forward to keep on moving on that road, where ever it takes me and himBut I know, if I get lost, were at least lost together. And you as my guider :)

I love you and i can't wait for the journey ahead
I hope you are too- xoxxo <3>

printscreen

I regret not print screening my hasil for ugm but now i have for ui :D

ACCOMPLISHMENTS :)

OMG HAVE I BEEN IN A WHIRLWIND!
This year is by far the best and the most hardest year of my life
I have proven to everyone that I am CAPABLE to accomplish what I set my mind to
But most importantly, I have given myself a reason to keep learning :)

ALHAMDULLILAH HIROBILALAMIN, ANDANTA IZZATI DJAFAR TELAH LULUS UGM HUKUM DAN UNIVERSITAS INDONESIA JURUSAN KRIMINOLOGY :')

I have always doubted myself, And now i have reason not to :)
Thank you so much to everyone who believed in me and put all their heart TO HATE ME because see haters..

I WIN IN THE END. BYE FUCKERS HELLO FUTURE :D

Hometown

I just came back from kunningan and I feel this grave, sick and empty feeling
It is no doubt that me and my cousins hate going back home
Nontheless maybe because we haven't really felt what home really ment
We aka me and my cousins never understood why my loder brother and sisters loved going back home
But when I went back yesterday to come and see my whole family again to celebrate my little cousins manhood, I really felt like I was home
well, at least understood what it ment

I couldn't hold back the tears as I was bidding farewell to my family
I have realized that they have always wanted me back, and always loved and cared for me
while I was just always wanting to get away from them :'(
I have been keeping this huge egoism that I have never ment to change, and realizing how much pain I have given in return
Family in kunningan to me, is a place where you come back home.
Where you belong, became and grew mentally

Im quite satisfied that I have learned that before I leave
I will make sure that I see them more before I can't see them at all anymore

You never realized what you have got until its gone.
And that's definitely my lesson taught


I huge shoutout and love to my family there, CANT WAIT UNTIL THE NEXT TIME I COME SEE YOU GUYS :)

dilemma not worth thinking about

Seriously, UAN is in like 4 days and im like completely NOT IN the mood at all
Im sick and I was supposedly supposed to come in to school to do a praktek for TIK
IM SICK YO!!

school should start being smart on how they make their schedules
Im not showing up out of no where just because they told me too
Wheres their responsibility?
Don't mind me, im saying all of these because IM NOT IN SCHOOL AT THE MOMENT TO DO TIK

fmy life.


Karena UAN bentar lagi, mohon maaf dan doa buat semuanya

semoga tahun ini angkatan kelas 12 lulus UAN semua 100% :)

amiiin!

complications

Ive been so confused and having this huge dilemma on my future studies
I have been recently accepted into University of Gadjamada
And looking forward and anticipating my future test of acceptance in University of Indonesia
Its every kids dream to get to UI if you live anywhere in the ten mile radius of Indonesia
And its been hard to realize which one I really want and which one I really need
On one side I would like to make my family happy and proud and honored that their last and doubtful kid can get a uni in NY and I would like to be in NY for my future credit, But I would really like to be here and study law
But what am I to say what the future hold?

ALHAMDULLILAH

ALHAMDULLILAH ANDANTA I. DJAFAR

KETERIMA DAN LULUS UJIAN MASUK PBS HUKUM :)


THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT AND PRAYERS
HOPEFULLY THE INTERVIEW WILL GO AS PLANNED

AND LOTS AND LOTS OF THANKS AND LOVE FOR MY BOYFRIEND, ARDAN PERDANA :)

FOR EVERY SINGLE DROP OF LOVE YOU HAVE GIVEN ME


XOXXO

4 am

Its actually 43 past 4, but all is good
I dont know why im awake but I cant go back to sleep and that's for sure

How is everyone doing?
Which I think you will be reading this around afternoon-ish, am I right?

Exams have taking over my head.
And its getting to my weekends too!
The weirdest thing is that im not studying that hard for the exam
I MEAN IM GIVING MY ALL
but UAN is deff not my priority right now..



ME AND ANGIE BAIKAN LHOOOOOOO :D

complete happiness is filling me right now, hahahhahaha
Im back with the dumb-shit that makes me laugh all day!
pretty good to be back

Im not up for wild stuff right now, but all me angie do to relieve stress, is to just SHOP!
And I need to stop that right now -.-

Firefly

Karma.
UGH.
I hate this subject of hindu believes
But what goes around comes around
I feel really bad and guilty for the stupidity I have piled on someone
I just should've given my insecurities a break, And I pushed it
Im not regretting anything I did
Im just saying that instead of giving it my best effort to make it work I made it a deision that me and him are just not ment to do what normal people do

His a complexed person.
someone who's just really psycho
Normal average joe down the street
And i still dont quite grasp where I went wrong.
Well, until i realize im not going to be with him for a very long time

Its like getting used to having your pea's and carrots seperate
and now there is NO PEAS.
Just carrots.
Empty, delicate carrots.
I had not considered what it would be like to actually be AWAY FROM HIM
I should've k known what was coming
Since, in the first place, made all this mess
Im probably going though this phase cause a slap of reality made me wake up

I lost valuable, granted time
Time where I could see his visibility, and then maybe
JUST MAYBE.
by the slightest chance, actually want to be with him

Its astonishing how careless and blind someone is until that thing just slowly disappears from view










View not only where the eye can see, but also the heart